Just One Prayer

by - 6:24 PM

I have had major milestones, circumstances, valleys and mountains happen to me that resulted out of extremely honest prayers.

These prayers were ones that reached up to God, desiring his will over mine, giving him complete control over my life. But what resulted wasn't what I expected nor thought.

An important question to ask yourself before you pray a big prayer like these is "what condition is my heart in?". If you are asking God for something, for your own benefit, then you may not be in the right place.

Three things come to mind:
1. Do you trust Him?
2. Are you willing?
3. Will you sacrifice?

I have had to sacrifice many things with no promise of something better right away. But in the long run, looking back, I can see God's hand in all of it. I trusted him with my life, and it hurt alot, but because I was willing to go through it all with Him by my side... I have come out a better person because of it.

Honest Prayers:

1. God, do you exist?
I prayed that MANY times and got no answer. In fact, it seemed even more silent around me than usual. I was so concentrated on hearing his vocal voice tell me "I AM REAL NOW BELIEVE" but it didn't work that way for me. I got to the point where I finally prayed an honest prayer from my heart, no longer testing God but rather reaching to him with my entire heart

"God, if there is something that is keeping me from knowing you, show me what that is. Please. I want to know you and feel you and hear you, but I just don't. Show me what I have to change to have this relationship with You"

It was through what resulted next that gave me clarity. I was listening to the Pastor preach and it became evident God was telling me that my relationship with my boyfriend was standing in the way of my relationship with Him. How could I possibly find my true identity in Christ if I was relying in my boyfriend for my identity? I laughed and said to Him "I understand, but you are going to have to take him out of my life yourself because I'm not strong enough to do that".

Within the hour... the HOUR... we were broken up. I had called him later that evening and by the end of the conversation he had broken up with me. God could have appeared to me in a vision, or audibly said "I exist" but instead he worked in the way He does best... through the heart. I had to get to a position of surrender before He could do anything. But once I did, I was able to enter into a relationship with Christ that FULLY depended on Him.

2. God, if this is not pleasing to you, put a brick wall in front of me.

I was in a Christian relationship that I felt God provided as a result of probably annoying prayers. I had been praying for a good man that loved God and asked that I meet him within the week. I met someone, we started dating right away and it was great. But then it started to not feel right, and my friends were telling me to be careful. I started feeling lack of peace and my relationship with Christ was suffering. I remember exactly where i was in my car when I was bending God's ear towards me. I asked him "If this is not pleasing to you, just put a brick wall in front of me so I know". The next day (or it could have been the same day!) I met with a friend who told me our mutual friend saw his profile on an online dating website. Now THAT was a brick wall - and i had a choice. I confronted him about it, and he denied it, but believing him or not believing him was NOT the point. I quickly forgave and decided ending the relationship was the best decision. We ended on good terms and to this day I thank God for responding to my prayer. I have grown so much as an individual since that day. Now, it's important to say that I believe if I had decided to stay with that guy, I believe God would have been able to work through our relationship and I could have led a fulfilling life. BUT. I also know that surrendering to God's way is far better than Him blessing my way.

(You can read my reflections on this prayer in my blog "Pursue Christ, Don't Chase After Boys")

3. God, please provide _____ for me.

I have been in a lot of situations where I had to completely rely on God to work in order to move forward. I really wanted to go on vacation, to lay on a beach and relax, but I didn't want to go alone. In the midst of complaining about my unfortunate situation to a co-worker/mentor, they in turn challenged me to ask God for someone to go on vacation with. Why didn't I think of that? I asked and guess what? The next bible study I attended a girl in the group was saying how she wants to go on vacation but had no one to go with... um yea... we ended up booking a vacation within the next couple of weeks and we are now best friends. In fact, we call one another "Twin" because we understand one another in a way that no new friends should. We are convinced we have been cut from the same mould and that potentially, Jesus, God and the Holy Spirit high fived when we met. Yea. That is the power of prayer.

Our prayers have power. They can tear down a mountain that is in front of us, or they can build a city. I have experienced the weight of my prayers (both good and painful - please refer to "Be Careful What You Pray For" blog) but in the end, I know that there is extreme importance on examining one's heart behind the prayer.

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